New York, New York

I have a decidedly love-hate relationship with New York City. At any given moment -- and sometimes at the very same moment -- I find myself in a suspended emotional state holding both love and hate in equal balance.

Because I was staying in Time Square, in August, where the undulating sea of humanity decides to walk three-abreat down the sidewalk while they gape at the bright lights of the Big City (arrrgh), I found myself veering toward places I knew and loved to keep that love-hate thing firmly aligned.

Here are two restaurants I have come to trust as consitently reliable, offering great service, decent value and thus recommend highly:

Brasserie 100 E. 53rd 212.751.4840
I treated myself to dinner alone and reveled in a 3-course prix fix menu that cost $35.00! Brasserie offers a consistently delicious fare, excellent and unobtrusive service and a wine list that would impress anyone from Napa. Also, it's got a very sexy NYC vibe going. They've done a great job with the bar area, the lighting and you must check out the restroom!

'Cesca 164 W. 75th 212.787-1081
Another culinary home run. 'Cesca is known for its fresh pasta and it doesn't disapoint. I have dined here with my friend Henry who always brings a fabulous bottle of wine from his own cellar -- so I haven't a clue about the wine list. I can, however, vouch for the food.

That's all for now.....

This Little Piggy Goes to Market

Summer is here and the New York International Gift Fair bekons. This Fair is pure pandemonium with aisle upon aisle of merchandise --- some of which is divine and good amount of which isn't. It's a test of endurance and courage to wade through all the stuff looking for the right combination of goods for Fete.

So what do I look for? How do I know it when I see it?

I am a wayward heir of William Morris. Morris is attributed with the Arts & Crafts movement which really kicked off the Modernism. His driving philosophy was "good design for all" and that is cornerstone of my belief and one of the reasons I opened Fete. I believe that beauty is the 5th food group and something as nourishing to the soul as the 4th food group - chocolate. In all seriousness, it is just as easy to live with beauty as it is to live with shlock, so why not choose the former?

Of course, good design can be expensive but it doesn't always need to be. Thus my guiding principle for merchandise is whether or not the item is beautiful and tactile. Do I want to touch it? Is it well made? Does the design support the function ? Is there balance and proportionality? How is color used? Finally, is it something I would buy for myself ? If yes, then would I pay what I'm asking my customers to pay? If the answer is yes, then it gets on the short list.

I further winnow from the short list to make sure the items selected fit within the overall context of the store's theme: entertaining. The item must adhere to something that can be used as a party theme -- like pajamas or gardening; be a delightful hostess gift, provide a finishing touch or flourish for the at-home entertainer; or finally, serve to make one more "entertaining" through witty, ribald, well-informed conversation.

At the end of the day and what I hope for most is that every item selected is something that is timeless, beautiful and functional and will delight others as much as it does me.

"& Guested" and Other Etiquette Hieroglyphics

There is an art to being a great guest and it seems like most of us (and I include myself in this shameful group of folk) take short-cuts with our "guestiquette" - and hope no one notices we're slacking. But the short-cuts are as visible to the hostess as walking around with toilet paper stuck to the bottom of our shoe.

It's the little things that make a big impact and here's a quick run down about how to get that toilet paper off your shoe.

1. Remember to RSVP and get extra points for doing it within 7 days of receiving an invitation.
2. Show Up on Time and get an atta girl for arriving no later than 30 minutes after the time for which the party is called.
3. Were You "& Guested"? Here's where the hieroglyphics of reading invitations come in. Take a look at how the invitation was addressed. If it was to you, and you alone, then it means you alone are invited. If you were "& guested", (that is the say the envelope reads Millicent Rogers and Guest) then you were "& guested" and are welcome to bring a date. It's really easy. Now, here's where you can collect $200 while passing GO, if you were not "& guested" don't call the hostess and ask if you can bring a guest with you. There maybe be a host of reasons (pun intended) that you were not "& guested" - there could be seating or budget limitations -- and by simply assuming it's ok to show up with another person as your guest, or calling to ask if you can bring someone along with you, you put the hostess in a very odd predicament.
4. Hostess Gift. Indeed, don't show up empty handed. Bring a little something to acknowledge the effort that someone is making to entertain you. Pssst....don't bring fresh flowers, send them the day after!
5. Oh, Behave! Heck....it's a p-a-r-t-y. Put away your Blackberry, don't scream at the caterer and then root around in the refrigerator for something else to eat other than what's being served, don't switch placecards just 'cuz. Grow up, put on your big boy pants, and try to be charming, especially if it doesn't come naturally to you. Go ahead, pretend if you must and focus for an hour on something other than your neurosis or yourself. If you are a Californian, don't talk about the gains you've made in real estate. If you are from Hollywood, be here now and focus on the person to whom you are speaking -- dare to make eye contact. If you are from Silicon Valley, most of us won't understand or care who you are Twittering and who is Twittering you. If you are from Orange County, remember that everyone else in the room may not agree with your perspective on Mexicans or the merits of driving Escalades. If you are from the Bay Area, remember, not everyone may agree with you about alot of things so try not to wag a scanctimonious finger at them if you find you have differing opnions.
6. Leave on Time and get kudos for not departing early while boasting about the other parties or three to which you are heading.
7. Thank You, Vielen Dank, Merci, Gracias. It doesn't matter how you say it, but it matters that you say it -- thank you. Call. Email. Major Brownie points for sending a hand-written note.

Lest you think we've waded deep into Edith Wharton territory, I assure you we have not (more on THAT in another post). What I've described above is the bare minimum of courtesies to make sure people don't confuse you with a knuckle-scraping ape. Yes - the BARE MINIMUM.

And now that you have all these great points, how do you spend them? By returning the favor and hosting a party of your own. Go ahead and kick up your heels, make the effort for your friends, and when your heels are up in the air, make sure to check 'em for toilet paper.

Let us know how your next party turns out and whether or not your guests' etiquette has an impact on your own guestiquette.

It All Starts With The Invitation

People always ask me "what makes a great party?" and I always answer "it all starts with the invitation." The reason? Everyone uses Evite, a casually sent email missive or the telephone as their mechanism for inviting guests. This "come one, come all" method conveys to those who are invited a mix of the following information: first, you, the invitee are one of many and therefore not that important to the overall success of the event; next, I as the hostess am really too busy to take the time to properly invite you; finally, if you aren't important and I'm too busy, this party spells disaster!

As I say, if you are going to take the time to entertain, then pay attention to the details. The very first detail is the invitation. I like printed invitations sent via snail mail. Yes, they now seem to be a quaint relic of the good old days, but the reason I like them so much is threefold: 1) each person feels special and excited when opening a hand-addressed invitation; 2) it shows that you care about your guests , how you entertain, and that your soiree will be special; 3) the simple act of sending an invitation sets you apart from everyone else.

Go ahead, dare to be different! Let me know how your party turns out if you decide to send an invitation via snail mail.

More riffs to come on invitations in future posts.

Jackie